Through the Wrong Gateway
by agnikai58
Summary: Korra and Asami are in dire need of a vacation and where better than the Spirit World? Unfortunately they find themselves in a very, very different world where nothing makes sense and everyone is insane.


Kuvira had been tried then imprisoned and her army disbanded. The world's most eccentric bachelor had gotten finally gotten married much to the delight of some gambler somewhere and to the disappointment of bookies everywhere. Prince Wu had decided to convert the Earth Kingdom to democratic city-states and Korra had offered to help but first things first. She had promised Asami a vacation.

Ahead of her a yellow pillar of light stretched upwards into the sky from the center of a morass of green vines. Korra reached out to her side taking Asami's hand in hers as they walked forward to the mound it was coming out of. The Avatar turned to face Asami as they stepped into the beam and their other hands came together.

Korra had traveled through the portals before but Asami never had and the engineer's nerves were present in her eyes even if she tried to keep it off her face. The specks of light in the beam began encircling them both of them and the pair slowly faded as they departed their world for another.

The two of them re-materialized just as Korra knew they would but not exactly where she was expecting. Korra looked around her at what seemed to be some kind of bank vault for a long moment before looking sideways at Asami. She blinked once then rubbed at her eyes before taking another look only to realize she wasn't seeing things. "What are you wearing Asami?"

"What am I wearing? What are you wearing?"

Both women looked down at themselves, at each other, then back down at themselves again. Asami was dressed in a white bodysuit with a golden halo but its most notable feature were the pair of yellow and white wings attached to her upper back. Korra on the other hand was wearing a thick suit of blue and gold armor, complete with its own pair of attachments. Korra lifted her left arm to look at the contraption on the wrist. "Does this thing look like fireworks to you Asami?"

Asami leaned in to take a closer look and she hesitantly tapped on it with a gloved finger. "Kinda yeah but who makes fireworks out of metal? I have a better question though. How did we get into these outfits and how do we take them off?"

Korra patted at her chest as she looked for some kind of lever or button that might help her. "I don't know... wait what are these?" Lying against the wall next to them was some sort of elaborate staff and a metal pipe with what looked like a handle on one end. Korra lifted the pipe and rotated it in her hands. "Look, this thing has more fireworks on it. Is this some kind of launcher?"

Asami glanced at it for a moment as she picked up the staff. "It could be, but who makes a fireworks launcher that you hold in your hands? That's a good way to get hurt." She raised the staff up for a better look. Most of it was a slender pole but its top was noticeably thicker and it had three white prongs on it.

TRAVELING TO DORADO.

"Who said that!?" yelled Korra as her and Asami's heads swiveled as they turned every which way trying to figure out where that female voice had come through. The room was empty except for the two of them. Korra sprinted to the vault door and looked out of it but there was nobody outside that she could see.

PREPARE YOUR DEFENSES.

Korra slowly walked backwards away from the circular door and over to where Asami was standing. "Prepare our defenses? Okay weird loud voice coming from nowhere, I'll get riiiiight on that... do you have any idea what's going on Asami?"

Asami opened her mouth to reply but suddenly something appeared in front of them. It was shaped like a human but there was no skin to be seen, its entire surface nothing but white armor and green rivets. Sharp metal objects were nestled between the knuckles on one hand and the hilt of a long curved blade poked up over its shoulder. The thing turned around to look at them with a glowing green slit that passed for eyes. Without warning it leaped upwards then impossibly leaped _again_ while _in the air_ and came towards them. Korra's hands balled into fists, ready to fight, as it landed in front of them.

"I need healing."

The Avatar and Asami looked at each other for a moment then back at the newest addition to the room. "What?" asked Korra.

"I need healing."

Asami shrugged and poked Korra in the shoulder. "That would be you."

"But there's no water in here."

Asami rolled her eyes. "Then go find some."

"I need healing."

"You already said that." muttered Korra as she started heading for the door but whatever it was stayed right in front of Asami. She put her hands on her hips as she turned to yell at the man. "Are you coming or what?"

"I need-."

"Stop saying that!" both of them yelled at the same time. Korra opened her mouth to say something more but she never got there when a another figure appeared. A hulking behemoth in silver armor stood before her, its spiked helmet grazing the roof above them. It held a hammer that looked like it weighed as much as Korra in a hand big enough to crush her skull between its massive digits. The sheer mass of the thing was enough to throw Korra back to the days when she had been a little girl looking up at her then impossible huge father.

It lifted one hand towards her and a man's voice bellowed outwards. "Catch phrase!"

"What, I don't get it. Why are you saying that?"

"Catch phrase!"

After repeating himself again the man lumbered past her and Korra caught a glimpse of what looked like an active furnace on his back before he disappeared out the hole. Korra groaned as she squeezed her forehead. "What is wrong with this place? That guy just says catch phrase and this moron here-"

"I need healing."

"SHUT UP!" Both of them yelled in unison.

Two more people appeared right then, both of them women. The first had on a strange blue dress that didn't cover her thighs or legs and she was carrying what looked like some of welding torch if Asami had to guess. The second one is what drew Asami's attention however. Her reddish-purple armor was too revealing for Asami's taste and her skin was an alarming shade of blue. She looked around for a moment, brandishing some sort of strange device in her hands. She blew a kiss at Korra before leaving. "Ouh, la, la."

"Come on Asami, let's go look for a way out of here. This whole place is insane."

It was as good a suggestion as any but one easier said than done. Asami hadn't the faintest idea how they had gotten here in the first place, much less how to get back home. She picked the staff up in both hands as she headed out through the door. The man with the sword jumped into the air above her head and somehow flew forward, lines appearing in the air behind him. Thankfully he kept silent as he sprinted ahead. "I guess we should follow him?" suggested Asami.

The strangeness of the people and their equipment had made it obvious this wasn't their world but it was a fact only reinforced by the strangeness of the buildings. Asami wasn't an architect but she could still recognize general patterns in each of the four nations or Republic City and nothing here was familiar to her. The woman in the blue dress ran past them only to stop and punch a cactus.

Korra and Asami exchanged yet another glance as tendrils of light reached out from her welding torch, picking the cactus pieces up off the ground and then she ran off with the pieces of the plant hovering midair at the end of those blue-white beams. "These. People. Are. Insane."

Asami couldn't disagree but like it or not, they only had one lead to figure out what was going on around here and it was the four other people who had appeared in the bank vault like they had. She shook her head and kept moving, following the same route the others had gone.

As they passed underneath a wall the two of them heard the clamor of explosions and mayhem. In front of them, past a fountain in the middle of a courtyard lined with hanging lights and strange animal shaped decorations was a truck. The armored giant from before was standing atop it, swinging his giant hammer from side to side as he brawled with a furred white beast wearing glasses and wielding some sort of device that spat... lightning?

Spheres of blue light floated through the air, yellow orbs were bouncing to and fro, the giant collapsed in a heap and the truck was moving forward.

"Fire in the hole!"

The unmistakable sound of an engine filled the air, steadily growing louder and louder. Then they saw it, a tire festooned in chains and cruel spikes cresting a nearby wall. The Avatar and her companion both screamed as it hurtled off the wall at them and exploded midair above them.

Korra and Asami reappeared back in the bank vault, their hands shaking and eyes wide. "What just happened?" asked Korra.

"I think we just... died."

"That's dumb, if we died then how are we standing here?"

"I don't know Korra."

"Teleporter online." They didn't recognize the voice but it had to the be the woman in the blue dress, she was the only one who hadn't said anything. An egg shaped translucent patch of pale blue was now floating above a metal stand in front of them.

"Teleporter?" said Korra. "Does that sound like portal to you Asami?"

"I guess so. Do you want to try it? I don't know where it'll take us but it's that or stay here with that tire."

Korra sprinted towards the device, not wanting to stay here in this insane asylum that passed for a world any longer, Asami just behind her. The last thing she heard was a cry in the distance.

"I need healing."

TRAVELING TO HANAMURA.


End file.
